Things I have learned since moving to the ranch:
1. Cows are not as cute as you think.
2. Lambs are even cuter than you think.
3. Dogs are great, when you don't have 13 of them.
4. A romantic date will now include chopping firewood together.
5. That innocent mud puddle is probably not that innocent.
Were I to sum up the last 6.5 months in one word it would be exhaustion. Who knew ranching was so much work? Don't you just throw hay at some mindless beasts and they grow into tasty burgers, or something? Let me tell you, your grocery store is lying to you!
These past 11 days, the hubby has been across country, visiting old friends and going to a nation-wide sheep "show & shine"... And we have been tasked with keeping up with his very basic of daily chores. (In truth, it's only a fraction of them). We're feeding 13 dogs, walking dogs morning and night, and checking on sheep, who incidentally, have this nasty habit of dying rather easily. These 3 easy tasks take ALL DAMN morning. We start around 9am, end around noon. As well as keeping kids fed and unmaimed. Then, and only then, can we get on to our regular full time jobs and responsibilities.
Its surprisingly brutal. Initially, I thought "Yeah this will be great! Start my day off with some fresh air, a little exercise and than wind my day down with a little fresh air and light exercise". About mid way through day 3 was when my enthusiasm started to wear thin. First, let me start off by saying cow dogs s-u-c-k. Period. Especially cow dogs who pretend to love you but who are really only loyal to their lord and master. It took them all of 4 minutes to realize that it was I who was supervising them and not their almighty. "Yeah, she kind of smells like him, but she's not him.... Wanna go sniff bushes for 4 hours?" Any love for dogs I may have had, has died over these last few days.
My enthusiasm for sheep had never been great to begin with, so no great loss there. Although we did have the very last lamb of the season born a couple days ago. So absurdly cute! I think I'll name him Bloomer (short for Late Bloomer), considering he was late by almost a month!
Cows are apparently generally self sufficient this time of the year, so we lucked out there.
Things I never, ever, ever thought I'd do in my whole entire life:
1) Keep a cows prolapsed uterus inside her with the toe of my shoe while helping to stitch her vagina closed,
2) Bath a dog in apple cider vinegar, repeatedly, for months.
3) Try to revive a lamb by dipping it in a water trough,
4) Help pull a calf with a huge hand operated harness & pulley system thing,
5) Watch the person I love don shoulder length plastic gloves.....
It's been a whirlwind of emotion, insecurity, and physical incapability, topped off with a steep, steep learning curve. It's funny though, despite everything, I have yet to have a moment of true regret. I look back on what my life was, and sure there are some aspects I do miss, but for the most part that life seems like a very distant hazy dream.
It seems like every day comes with some new "you'll never believe what I just did!" adventure. Hence, this blog. It just too funny not to share with someone!
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